Lose Gracefully

Yup, you heard it right! At a time when everyone asks you to win I am saying, if and when you happen lose, bow out with grace.

Surprised?

We can’t always win, well we can, but probably won’t across all spheres of life. Like it or not it’s true.

Let’s take sport, when a team or individual is battering the opponent, the battered at times gets in to a verbal duel, or stiff and rude body language.

During a heated argument, between father and son, husband & wife or between girlfriend and boyfriend, I’ve often seen one party take off on a tangent and just go crazy, despite knowing they are wrong. And this lingers forward in to the future!

A lot of times I’ve seen relationships end on bitter notes, and the last words exchanged are not pleasant, to say the least. One party has more grief than the other and often ends up saying nasty things, some they don’t even mean. Actually I’ve seen a lot of this with my friends!! Ha !

People start to get hysterical when losing because their ego gets hurt and comes in to play. You can say it’s their natural defense mechanism to save face. But what they end up doing is to demean all great moments cherished in the past, and probably end any possibilities of future reconciliations.

Most people just remember the ‘bitter parting’ and hold it close to their heart and mind, because that’s the last ‘experience’ they had! So much for positive energy – read energy & karma.

What people don’t realize is that there are times that you need to keep your ego aside and just try and be large hearted.  This will at least make the parting amicable, peaceful, easy and maybe leave room for future reconciliation. But above all – it will and should keep a level of respect intact. Respect is important, don’t let your ‘situational loss’ take away respect.

I said, stay calm, accept reality – keep the ego aside. 

When you know you are wrong and aren’t really ‘wining’, there is nothing wrong in losing gracefully.

You Are Not Buying Convenience; You Are Selling Your Right

I had the unfortunate task of ferrying a friend to the liquor store a few days ago, and instead of waiting outside, I stepped inside the store. I was surprised to see the shopkeeper charge him double the price for an Indian brand of wine. I couldn’t help it, so I started to look all over the bottle to find the MRP and to my surprise, I couldn’t see it. The shopkeeper simply said “this is how much we charge” Period. My friend paid, as if it was no big deal. He was completely oblivious to the actual price , or to what just took place.

This post isn’t about a shopkeeper overcharging for wine.

This is about the city I live in. The problem lies in the inhabitants of this city and their mindset. Surprised?

Gurgaon , has transformed in to a mini city populated with major corporations and people who are employed in these corporations. I’m not going to try and give a demographic profile, but I will list what these people go through, because I am one of them.

Young people have comparatively more ‘perceived disposable income’ and less time. They feel proud of the money they make, the life they lead and why shouldn’t they? They don’t like hassles.  I come across people who are proud to announce that they work 12 hours a day, and spend another hour commuting, so they don’t have any time whatsoever for anything else. They are so happy to pay a premium or get charged more for anything or everything, and feel proud they can afford it. 

They feel proud because they feel it separates them from the rest, it marks a shift from what their parents had to go through and they confuse this with prosperity, in the quality of life sphere.

They begin to further confuse this convenience with peace and happiness – which is even dumber.

Somehow, in their knowhow of things, awareness of their ‘society and rights as citizens’, is so fucking LOW, its appalling!

In Gurgaon, most neighborhood’s have private security, lots of electricity they consume is privately generated. People prefer to use private courier / postal service. Anyone who can afford private healthcare [ the people I am referring to certainly can and do] goes for it, along with private education for their children, if and when they manage to produce and nurture them with the help of multiple nanny’s.

So, I can debate the fact that I should build a case to pay less tax to the state. Because the basic civic amenities that I need are being met by me PAYING Extra money for, to private players! I don’t mind paying a federal tax, but I certainly hate the fact that indirectly I am also paying tax to the state of Haryana, for which I’m getting zilch!

Don’t worry I won’t bore you with the economics.

I’ll leave you with a general mindset in Gurgaon. Local people think that the new inhabitants have more money, lets charge them for it, they always agree to pay.

People who work in big glass buildings – I’m not from here, I don’t know how it works, I just wanna get on with it and can afford to do so. My money is good for what it’ll fetch me!

I often remind these people that they live in a bubble, and bubbles always burst, and when it bursts there is chaos. Collectively, we need to correct what is happening. And will it begin by shedding our self proclaimed financial prosperity and material progress. People need time to think about life, others, introspect and act – that is the essence of life isn’t it?

Irony ; the young people we consider educated, pillars of society and agents of change, continue to live in oblivion. What they don’t realize is that they are not buying convenience; they are selling their right.

They are certainly not behaving ‘young’

This is what scares me.

Being Selfless Lets You Be Yourself

I’ve had this chat with many friends before, and so I thought I’d write about it.

The problem with people is that they believe they can only show affection to someone who is something to them and as long as they can lay claim to them. Example: Can only love my boyfriend as long as he is my boyfriend. Can help someone if he is someone to me?

Why can’t you love someone for who they are and celebrate that, independent of how they feel towards you or what they are to you?

You can’t because you are looking to lay claim! Try and get rid of your ego and perceived identity and look deep in to the other person, you will see human values that are similar to yours. And you’ll realize there is no difference between you and him.

Then you will see barriers collapse. Your selflessness will bring out your true self, suddenly you are accessible to everyone and everyone sees you. More importantly you see everyone for who they are and not what they are only to you. Being selfless lets’ you be YOU, and really just YOU.

Now everything will look beautiful, because you are not looking to lay claim at or on anything. Therefore nothing and everything is wonderful. Love will pour and ooze out of everything.

You, as an individual have to feel complete on your own to experience bliss and stay selfless. You don’t need anyone or any object to come and complete you. I’ll tell you why.

An incomplete person, who feels he isn’t complete and who is looking to be complete, will never be able to give his best in what he is looking for, be it love, relationship, work or just trying to lay a claim, and that’s why he is trying to lay a claim on to someone or something. To feel complete, which is the starting point of selfishness.

Be in love with yourself, and the world will seem a lovable place, you will be loved, everyone will run after you with joy, because they can sense you love selflessly, and don’t want or seek anything from them, except to appreciate them, and that your emotion and intentions are pure.

The day you learn to be successful in a relationship is the day you ascend, and come out of all selfish relationships and transcend the boundaries of ‘claim’. That is when you are in sync with the true spirit of love.

So, shed your selfishness to be yourself.

Hypocrisy- Punish The Corrupt But Spare The Corruptor

Before I was leaving for my holiday, a friend of mine asked me if I could pick up an electronic gadget for him, as it was at least 30 % cheaper abroad. I said of course why not, what’s the harm.  Since the item in question was of a significant size, I asked him if it would attract custom duty and whether it would therefore be worth buying it for him.

He was shocked at my question. I was shocked at his ‘shock’. So, what the hell had I said!!! I was completely sober – it was 11 in the morning! So what could I have said?

He suggested I pay a tiny unofficial bribe and not the duty. He said that is how it works. No one pays duty! I told him to sod off!! Hey, why should I pay a bribe, why should I indulge in spreading corruption, something I stand against, and am very vocal about! That was the end of our conversation, no love lost between us.

This incident left me thinking, in fact it got me back to thinking about Anna Hazare and the anti corruption movement in India.

What my friend said or suggested points to a deep rooted cultural problem in our society.  We are a society that is COLLECTIVELY MORALISTIC but sacrifice everything for INDIVIDUAL comfort, progress and pleasure.  

This can be attributed to our feudalistic heritage where people had to struggle for basic essentials of life. Where the only way out was using their imagination and ingenuity. But what it has done is given social legitimacy to do anything, or sacrifice morals, for ‘small benefits’ to ensure daily survival.

We live in a society where the bribe giver is not looked down upon but the bribe taker is. Everyone wants to punish the bribe taker, but not speak of the bribe giver.  We’re a society transitioning through “delusional contradiction”.

This scares me; it scares me in a big way. Today we are ready to sacrifice our morals for certain things because we tell ourselves its ok to ensure we sustain. We even tell ourselves “it’s the system”.  The children of tomorrow will take it a step further.

I like the Lokpal bill, I support it and the endeavor by Team Anna. But I don’t think it is enough.

We need to cleanse society of this deep rooted moralistic malice; else our goal will always remain elusive.

Find Pleasure In Happiness, Not Happiness In Pleasure

I hear everyone suddenly say “happy new year”, and I smile at them.

My mind registers 3 distinct words instead of one phrase. It’s about the year ahead, which is new, but more importantly it’s about happiness.

I wanna spend some time on happiness and pleasure.

People often confuse the two, and I don’t blame them. People often indulge in acts, experiences or buy products that give them pleasure in that moment, and they think its happiness. What they have experienced is momentary pleasure due to an act or action. It is the temporary effect of an action which was performed to evoke this very desired feeling.

Once people mistake this feeling for happiness they want to constantly indulge in “pleasure acts” because they believe it will lead to happiness.

Example – I’ll buy new clothes, I’ll attend a party, I’ll dance, I’ll get a boyfriend, I’ll get married and feel settled, for the sake of feeling settled and it will give me pleasure therefore it will make me “complete” and thus I’ll be happy. These people end up chasing a state which is illusionary, and in their race to chase, and sustain this state, they feel stress, pressure and eventually empty. So where is the happiness?

Paradoxical? Were they not suppose to get pleasure which was the origin and culmination of happiness; bliss.

Now on to happiness.

Happiness is not temporal, it’s not subjective, it’s not derived from specific actions. Happiness is a way of life. Happiness is when you can smile without the condo, the beamer and a job. It comes and is linked to sense of finite security, positive energy and undying optimism. This is what is objective about happiness and not it’s manifestations.

Happiness is the joy that illuminates the mind, and soul at all times. It’s the smile you have when you go to meet your friends, parents or lovers. Happiness is not evoked by an external object, nor is any external object capable of being the source of YOUR HAPPINESS.

Happiness is not derived, it is lived. It’s in all the things you have to do- live!

A few days ago I explained to a friend, that while growing up I told myself I will only do the things I love – because it made me happy, but after some time I realized I’ll start to love all the things I have to do, else I’ll never be happy. I’ve never had a conflict or dull moment after that day. So don’t look for happiness in pleasurable acts, look for pleasure in happiness, because it’s a way of life.

I work with brands and advise marketers, and while I don’t want to relegate this post to marketing gyan. I must confess I have used this philosophy to help them construct brands and ideas that do not promise “fulfillment and joy” out of using their product, but rather espouse a larger cause which leads to real happiness.

So, please find pleasure in happiness and not happiness in pleasure.

Don’t Confuse Patience With Waiting

Our ability to wait for something is a huge strength and need. As individuals we are always waiting for something or the other to happen to us, eventually, as it would happen to us only if we waited, but till when? Please don’t think that waiting is a waste, in fact it is not a futile activity. But that depends on why you are waiting and what you are doing while waiting.

Our problem is that at times we do not know how to live in the current space and time because we are always waiting for something to happen to us in the future. We may wait for a promotion to happen or a relationship to work, and tell ourselves once this mini milestone happens to us in the future, everything will be fine. Right now, we just need to wait for that to happen. By doing this we’ve forgot to immerse ourselves in the present, which is the foundation of the future. Please don’t confuse this with patience.

I would like to point out the difference between waiting and having patience.

Patience can be a space and time where and individual has put in his effort for a respective action, and is therefore awaiting the result. Inane waiting is when you rest your faith at the hands of fate and wait for fate to act, rather than acting yourself! This is a reflection of our mental exertion, dependence on hope and our lazy nature. I call this our suspended state – as we neither move forward nor detract. It’s ‘zero inertia’ – I find it scary!

The more suspended you are, the more unconscious of yourself you are, the more you live life on the surface. All you tend to do is simply wait! This is “zero inertia” we always wait for something to change hoping that somebody will come and give us what we desire. Nobody will come until you let them come; take some action that elicits a response and reaction. And when they come latch on to accept that change!

Our life is like that. You will see that life is always knocking on your doorstep, every day, every moment. It is telling you to change. But you have no courage to change; you are waiting for change to happen. You just won’t be the change you always wanted. Everyone wants joy & bliss. But who or how many people actually ‘act’ towards achieving these? And what happens after they put in their actions. 

Sometimes we go through events and major instances in life, through which we learn and get the courage and motivation to break “zero inertia” to bring about change. This is the beginning of a new life, and not just a new lease of life!!

If all you do is crib and sob – yet hope [ read WAIT] endlessly, nothing much will happen except that you will allow nature to hammer you down – or bring you back to reality, at a point where you feel you’ve waited long enough and nothing can be salvaged.

Usually when people wait they wait with stress, anxiety and mental agony – that keeps them out of balance – and then a person cannot have patience, because he is close to desperate! He will take anything that comes his way!

Why travel till there? Get off a few stops earlier.

Waiting is good but only when you’ve performed your actions which are your Dharma.

Now you have put time by your side; time comes along with you on your journey and waits in your favor and not against you! Here time become your aid and tool, helping you to achieve your dreams and passions.

Who says Capital can’t be social

Something happened this weekend that forced me to think and ask myself the following question.

“When was the last time we stopped and felt proud of our accomplishments, and what type of achievements came to our mind?”

Most of us would think of milestones such as the first car, career, house and other tangible markers of success, in the material and individual sphere, because such things make people feel proud, inflate their ego and act as a mental stimulator, encouraging them to go after more.

People want to buy and demonstrate tangible assets & products because these assets and products are the most visible markers of personal progress within the social sphere. They signal the socio economic shift and mark an individual’s current standing in the social sphere. It represents their hard work, luck and most importantly and individual’s perceived importance within his ecosystem.

By doing this people are able to enjoy the comforts of their acquired assets / products and send out strong signals, like the ones I’ve mentioned above. But what does the larger public think of such individuals?

I’ve noticed and felt that the larger group and public don’t really form favorable opinions on someone’s visible assets / capital; in fact it’s become a blind spot. The public doesn’t really appreciate the individual’s effort and success, because everyone is out to get more! The benefits of the capital and value created are only relevant & restricted to an individual therefore no one bothers. So why should it inflate an individual’s ego – so why do people still follow the cycle?

This is where social capital becomes relevant. And I find it interesting. Go to a small town, village or even city. You’ll always come across someone who will proudly say “my grandfather got that library built” or “my family got the temple built”. And that is social capital.

Psychologists give extreme importance to social capital. It’s known to increase self esteem. It has the power to help people feel important, without them having actually done anything noteworthy. And this is possible because there is a bigger sense of gratification in knowing your [or parents] ability to GIVE rather than AQUIRE.

It gives a huge boost to the ego because it signals an individual’s intent to help community on his own without taking ownership of the asset he creates for the community. People retain control of their contributions by creating trusts etc. But it’s done after individually acquiring capital and then making it social; accessible to all.

Only if brands and large corporations knew how to leverage this sentiment for their CSR initiatives!

Say what you mean to mean what you say

When in conversation I always expect straight and simple answers, and usually take things at face value, and why shouldn’t I? It’s coming from people who I meet every day at work, in the neighborhood and even mates.

But in every second conversation, before someone is about to reveal something they think is significant comes this – “honestly speaking” – what the hell does that mean? Usually you’re not honest? Usually you don’t air your real views and perspective? Usually you just mislead everyone?

The other one that crops up in every 3rd sentence is “frankly speaking”. So, are people being apologetic for what they are about to say? Or do they just don’t have it in them to present their point of view without a polite or politically correct advance disclaimer.

Has this now become a matter conversation? Can’t people offer a point of view without these disclaimers, or does using these words and phrases make them feel they are saying something quite significant?

I find this silly , people should just speak their mind, all the time.

Identity doesn’t mean acceptance or entitlement

Identity and equity are based on many factors, and is a good thing that helps brands when they enter new territories, geographically or new categories, if exploited properly.

But lots of brands assume their potential customers are either ‘very thick’ or just treat them as the lowest common denominator – it sucks. Basically the marketing team doesn’t have a clue on how to  exploit the brands strength.

Yardley, for many Indians was/ is considered a up market premium brand for 2 reasons. It came from London and it wasn’t very accessible in India [Wasn’t directly marketed] for a long time.

The other day I saw this on the telly

I think it’s horrible. The marketing guys assumes that people will automatically flock to the brand if they just tell people / remind Indians that it is from London. It’s horribly done because

1. They have used a leading Bollywood actress, but that actress also endorses soap, a hair removing cream and many other mass market products.
2. Just by saying the brand is from London doesn’t mean it’s a GREAT product.
3. It fails to tell people what the brand stands for, or build any empathy with the consumer
4. It doesn’t look or feel fashionable at all. It’s stale!

 

The brand needs to work hard and earn the respect of it’s new target, yes it should stick to it’s source of origin for equity if it believes it’s a major strength, but needs to do stuff as if it was a fresh beginning.

Another brand that assumed it would do well in india was Marks & Spencers.

M&S ws always looked up to in India, especially as it wasn’t available here. People would buy M&S products when they went on trips and would ask people returning fro England to et them M&S stuff.

1. It’s a brand people like, look up to , and WANT.

 

So what to M&S guys do when they launch in India?

NOTHING

You heard me right. I remember reading their company spokesperson saying that they will not advertise focus on doing too many things to promote their brand in india. They didn’t have huge expansion plans either. Just one store to begin with.

What followed?

No great effort to push / build brand with people.

Assumed everyone will rush to buy products

Didn’t create great in store experience, compared to other high street brands.

And today – they are where they were 5 years ago – negligible. Not seen as premium or up market and worthy of paying a 40 % premium for.

Asia is a market where people look for Value, that doesn’t mean you need to strip to bare minimum, and t also means you can’t take lineage for granted. Earn it here & now. People have the money , show them the reason to spend it on you!

Difference Between Expectation & Reality = Stress

I often hear the phrase “I’m stressed”.  If I hear the phrase so often, so must others, so think of the number of people espousing it and believing that they are stressed!

The thought of that stresses you?  Ha!

Stress if of many types, but what really is stress? I think we should ponder on ‘stress’ itself for a while.

Stress is nothing but the difference between expectation & reality. Yes, it does sound like an equation, but that’s what it is. The way this equation plays up in day to day life gives rise to different manifestations of this scary and dreaded thing called stress.

The most common manifestation of stress, at least for young adults, arises from 2 things, from what I’ve gathered and heard.

1. Work, the lack of it or too much of it! Depends on where the individual is placed in the value chain! Ha!
2. Relationships, whether it’s to dump someone or the fear of getting dumped! Or wanting to be in one without knowing why, scary Aey?

Our parents have different types of stress.

My friend’s mother gets stressed when she thinks about her son’s “financial survival and success” if the son were to branch out on his own. It may sound weird, but this thought really stresses her out, maybe she expected him to be cruising in his profession/ career or on the other hand thought she’d be able to inculcate great business acumen in to him or set up a huge business empire for him and always remain in control herself to ensure it runs smoothly.

When neither of these scenarios seems to be meeting her earlier imagined expectations, she is getting stressed and in a big way. It may be said that it’s legitimate for her to be stressed for her son’s future well being and security. What she needs to understand is that she can’t always provide for him but what she can do is take stock of their expectations right now. I’m not for one moment suggesting they prune their expectations. What I am talking of is reality and trying to bridge the gap between expectation & reality, in the present context, only then can they try and increase ways of elevating expectations again after figuring out “now” and the way to “there”.

Ok back to the stress of the young.

 Profession or should I say work is a major factor for stress. To be specific it’s the boss, client or for some – the “management”.  

Some people take up jobs only to realize they are not equipped with the skills to deliver, or find it difficult for different reasons such as, motivation, guidance, clear instruction , un realistic time lines or lack of training to deliver and match employer / boss’s expectations. However the worrying factor is that they themselves believe that they have to deliver and their inability to deliver gives rise to insecurity and great stress.

From small things like having a report ready by Monday, people have to sacrifice family time, for which they get all round flack, to not being able to meet GF / BF [spend time with spouse] over the weekend, which depresses them because either one of them starts to wonder and feel insecure, just compounds the stress and multiplies it for other J this is the ordinary everyday stress. But its still stress, because these small things put people off in a big way and it affects the way they think, their mood, and attitude which in turn dictates their behavior. So, now these small things seem serious????

I use to have a team of 3 strategic planners and the toughest part of managing 3 people, apart from being in the same age group, was to keep them motivated and happy / positive. I’ll explain why.

When my team was bugged with problems it would always play on their mind which would reflect in their work, irrespective of whether they would bring in their personal problem to work or be de-motivated because of the actual “work” itself. 

At times I saw them stressed because they thought they won’t be able to deliver what was expected of them. This is when I would begin to ask them what they expected of themselves? Suddenly they would see the difference and feel lighter. I would ask them why they found strategic planning difficult or a pain that they thought they won’t be able to meet expectations of and they all realized there are other things which they could do, which they would enjoy without having apprehensions of delivery. The other thing they realized and confessed was that they were not really enjoying what they were doing. I had to have more chats with them and motivate them a lil and tell them that because this may not be their calling, doesn’t mean there is nothing for them.

By the end of it all the 3 planners in my team quit and went on to pursue things they really wanted to, and are doing well. Hopefully they have one less stress in life.

I just hate it when people get stressed because of issues of work that they stop living life. Everyone should get out of office by 5.30!!!! Life is better lived together.

Another type of professional stress comes when after completing Ivy League degrees your career doesn’t really take off. Here the ego sets in as people will not settle for anything less, only because they’re from Ivy League. More stress, for graduating from Ivy League this time. Some people are actually too good! Ha !

Na. I know people in this situation and it’s painful, I just tell them that reality is that your worth what someone is willing to pay you RIGHT NOW, not what you thought / expected you would get while enrolling for Ivy League! Swallow your ego, get working, and bridge the gap.

I won’t get in to details of the stress cause by relationships. If people can’t figure out what they like or dislike in someone, yet persist in hanging on to each other then god help them. If someone feels insecure that means their partner can’t make them feel secure or something is wrong with them, either way stress is what amplifies dissonance and increases problems.

People just need to accept reality, live with it and gte out of the mindset – “ I will only do things I enjoy” and move to “ I will start to enjoy the things I HAVE to do” , otherwise you will have more occasions to find faults with and increased dissonance.

I can say so by personal experience. While graduating from high school I started to resolve all the things that could possible stress me out and then came to things that I had to do in life but didn’t quite look forward to. I realized they had to be done and started looking forward to them and suddenly I began to feel lighter in the head.

Now people think I’m thick skin because I stay calm when we’re faced with lumps of shit, when the truth is the world won’t come to an end if we don’t attend a meeting or stick to a time line. What I have realized is that it’s not worth fretting over or giving up MY TIME. When  I have to work late it doesn’t piss me off a wee bit, because I tell myself  it’s something that’s imperative otherwise I wouldn’t be doing it, which makes me wanna do a great job.

What I would say is that have realistic expectations, which is different from ambition. Always pause take stalk to see whether you’re on route to your destination, if not you know what do. Do Not Fret!

This post is dedicated to someone who will increasingly need to resolve lots of tensions regarding expectations of self and employer, discipline and faculty of art and most importantly what they’re inner calling is and how to get there without losing heart or imagination . Till then, relax.

Misplaced Sense Of Financial Optimism

Who says you only have to learn from your own mistakes? Why can’t you learn from other people’s mistakes?

My friends were telling me about the property [read house] they just bought or, are in the process of buying.  I liked their approach on how they arrived at their decision and kept nodding my head, my sign of approval, with a huge smile. When it was my turn to speak I just had one question –

“How will you pay for this?

My friends had a perplexed look on their faces, as if I had asked a “no-brainer”. They must have been thinking “he must be really thick”.  Then they realized I’m serious and they set out to explain how they would make the payments, and how the housing loan be a huge component of it, which led me to my next question –  

“How the hell will you make such huge periodic [read chronic] payments in the future?”

Basically, they said that as they grow older their earnings would increase drastically; therefore they will be able to make much larger payments, so they can afford to take a larger loan based on greater future income. Hmmmmmmmmmm.

Ok I’m not a sucker nor am I a pessimist but somehow what my friends said didn’t sound right. In fact I find it stupid; blame it on my middle class upbringing where the only values that were spoken of or handed down to me were the ones with no financial value attached to them! Or blame it on my love for logic. I understand the difference between spotting a potential opportunity and taking risk to reap greater return, which makes complete sense and is great, but here the individual is getting in to something and knows of and the respective risk associated with his actions. What my friends are doing is being oblivious to risk all together. That is scary.

I digress , back to the point.

I’ll never forget 2 things Warren Buffet wrote in his annual letter to Hathway shareholders –

1, while, budgeting and planning for future, a person should always plan future expenditure based on current income

2, you should always have 2 sources of income

Now, point number 2 is what I call real insurance and point number 1 is about being grounded. I like that, it’s logical and reasonably ok to practice, well I hope it is! Then why do my friends think otherwise?

When the economic crisis was threatening to spoil the party for us in India, suddenly everyone went on an austerity drive, but as soon as the clouds drifted away, they’re back to their old ways. Have they forgotten horrible stories of real people losing jobs and their “lifestyle”? I pointed this out to my friends, but it didn’t make a difference. That’s when I realized their financial optimism but still failed to see what it was based on.

I understand positive sentiment, emotions and attitudes arising out of confidence, optimism, and being secure. What scares me is the absence of a real solid tangible reason for being financially optimistic, especially amongst the young. When I ask them this very question, the only response I get is “it’ll happen, somehow”. But they have no idea how! Isn’t this reminiscent of a “fatalistic life” which they themselves ridicule!  Ironical wouldn’t you say?

So why are they so optimistic?

Media creates a rosy picture and buzz gets amplified by increasing opportunities of employment which fuels optimism, which in turn lets individual take it easy and feel comfortable. This sense of comfort and entitlement entices them to consume, every product available on easy credit, screaming “buy me “. This is the beginning and the end. I say this because people need to know why they want to consume, when they forget that, it’s scary.

Another Big reason For Financial Optimism : A young person’s starting salary today may be equal or even greater than his father’s last salary. So suddenly people have started to think they have high paying jobs because their current reference point is that of the PAST!!!  Reality is that it’s not that simple ; the value of their current, self perceived high salary  isn’t that high. Here is why -

They live immersed in this financial optimism and forget the big picture; REALITY

So here is what people forget to factor in -

Just because you’re getting paid well doesn’t mean you’ll continue to get paid well. It’s fair to say that. So what happens when you can’t work? Remember, we no longer have pensionable jobs, as our parents use to. Yes MNCs pay well, but more and more people are being made redundant far before the official retirement age, if you’re wondering why – it’s cheaper for employers.

No financial planner can calculate time value of money and tell you how much money you’ll need to survive 20 years from now. Healthcare will eventually shift in the private sector’s domain, education almost has, and social anchorage is disappearing.

What my friends are oblivious to is the fact that when we were growing up our lifestyles were so bloody simple, and our parents income was sufficient for the time, because there were limited avenues for expenditure. I paid less that Rs 5000 for a undergrad college degree because it was subsidized by the state, but that won’t be the case going in to the future with the advent of private universities.

Today we create consumption occasions and drive every rupee out of the wallet. Yes that helps the economy grow, and as long as our economy continues to grow in wake of the global economic context, inflation will grow too, and it’s because of this inflation that our economy is still growing and we’re less affected. But it is eroding “value”.

So what do you do? Well – Asset creation by curbing current expenditure not borrowing more! Asset creation in context of current income so it can appreciate proportionately without seeming inflated.

I work with brands and my job is to make brands more profitable by bringing them closer to people.  So as you expected I am going to link this back to brands & marketing – evil me , Aeh?

Financial service brands go  on and on and propel us to invest through them so we get greater return and get more money and live a better life – How bloody shallow ! Everyone is doing that , al most in the same manner !

So if was advising a financial services brand, say a Life Insurance Company, Bank or MF brand I would urge them to use this insight of people having a misplaced sense of financial optimism in India, and perhaps Asia. I would advise these brands to use this insight and construct a brand that would inculcate a behavior of responsible financial handling NOT planning amongst the young and remind us of our value system, and not just do lip service like the Tobacco or alcohol industry, that says “ consume responsibly”. I would urge the financial brand to go much further, and make sure they don’t begin to instill fear while educating people. The brand should try and help people find the tangible reason for being financially optimistic. I like happy endings and brands that work in that direction.

Technology Tyranny ?

We all love technology, to the extent that it’s not just part of our lives but the backbone of life as we live it. [Maybe debatable as this may seem like a motherhood statement, but technology is embedded somewhere under our every action and interaction!]  

Technology is of many types but I wanna focus my attention to the most pervasive , common and unavoidable instrument through which people have started to live life J yes, it’s the laptop / Ipad , or any other similar sort of device that opens up the portal to life, as we will know it in the 21^st century.

I really like these devices and am a huge fan of what I call ‘technology for life’, but I know where to draw the line between life and virtual life.

The computer was man’s testament of intellectual triumph and invention to further enhance and simplify our life and that’s the only it should be, it shouldn’t be turning us in to brain dead lazy sods.

I love observing how people use or should I say, take technology for granted, and the effect ‘granted’ has on people.

I noticed school children and even adults are less concerned about spellings, learning or relearning!  – MS word automatically prompts and error and a right click correct the spelling. People, at times, don’t even bother to read the correct spelling, forget trying to learn the spelling.

I would love to do a study on people’s handwriting, I have a hypothesis, based on my tiny sample of Indian’s that I come across, that cursive handwriting is dying, people are becoming less patient when it comes to jotting things down and the number of drafts written is coming down – this slows the intellect, because writing and re writing with a pencil / pen has always helped us memorize, jotting things down has helped collect thoughts, and the number of drafts written in free hand have always been more creative, not to mention more iterative.  [Again debatable]

Math was never so easy, I remember learning all my tables and doing physical calculation with a pencil and paper, but I noticed my lil nephew just navigated to go programs, accessories and clicked on ‘calculator’. ! That is because he always sits in front of the computer while studying.

Sport, the thrill derived from physical activity, has been reduced to video games. The lads still claim they get the same thrill and high that they got out of the real thing, at times even more. The result of this is a world with more sick- lings and bunch of dweebs that aren’t ready to play ball! Nike , RBk, listening?

This was about people, but what is the computing, or should I say ‘tech’ industry up to?

There is a lot of talk about integration, simplification, building of communities, empowerment, and the effect of all this. Then there is the human network, which is virtual J

The category is so obsessed with creating the next app, with the belief that it will enhance human life, that the category fails to draw the line between real and virtual life.

There is no substitute to human interaction. A machine or interface can never demonstrate, or evoke the same emotions that another live being can. At best it helps us adapt and accommodate to living with ourselves. Yes technology has made us more ‘asexual’.

The category, along with the eco system, is propagating itself building a culture where life is lived through it. A TRUE portal

If I was a technology brand I know what I would do.

I would encourage people to flex their muscles; Brain & Braun

I would ignite though not awe

I would force debate not complacency

I would encourage rigor not convenience

I would encourage people to use their mind, once again

Suddenly, Goodbye Isn’t An Easy Word To Say

I’m going through mixed emotions because after 4 years I am leaving EURO – I quit on 30^th August 2010 and only now is it finally sinking in!

For me it’s been an eventful roller coaster ride so far in which I’ve tried to run away a couple of times only to realize that I couldn’t. This is where I grew up , literally , when I joined here i was 3 years in to the business but was thrown in to the deep end and well the rest is history.

I say mixed emotion because I wasn’t and am not ecstatic about leaving.

Well I wanna thank a few people in Particular, Suman, Sushant, Satbir & Ashwani for all the lovely chats and direction.

Sushant , for letting me loose and allowing me to run havoc after which he would often have clean up the aftermath and save me! He has never ever once told me so!

Suman for all the gyan and patience. For never ducking an awkward question I posed to him and doing the right thing, always.  

Satbir, for the lunches and relaxing chats.

Ashwani, for being my new business partner and putting up with all my last minute change in ‘programs’ !

I’ll be joining Ogilvy later this month.

So I guess thats it

Being full [of yourself] leaves no room to learn further.

Well I met a few planners the other day, even though I didn’t wanaa talk about work, that is where the conversation drifted to. The conversation left me really bored and irritated, even though I just stuck around for 5 mins of it.

There is a lot of talk on the blogosphere that these days’ planners rarely go out and learn stuff, observe people first hand or find real insights by ‘doing things’.

Well I completely agree with that, but I think the problem is far deeper that just being slack at work and thinking you’re cool because you’re a ‘planner’.

I once read something like this –

People rarely believe what others tell them [what they hear]

People somewhat believe what they see

People always believe what they tell themselves

I think that is exactly the problem with these planners, there are so full of ‘knowledge’ or they at least  believe they are so full of knowledge, that they just take their point of view as ‘insight’ without even realizing that maybe there is an alternative view or perspective.

What I have noticed is that when the occasion arises to present a real point of view everyone rushes to look for knowledge and a point of view through other’s writings, books or reports ; meta analysis? ??? – leaving their own POV aside, suddenly, I wonder why? Funny though

I read a lot of old books, really old books ; teaching of great sages and seers, and in that one scripture, a sage goes on to say –  “when the time comes learned people rush to look for knowledge / reference  externally, when all they have to do is look inside for a moment”  - these people suddenly forget that they’ve spent so many years being alive , dealing with people, listening to stories , going through different emotions and situations – all they need to do is understand themselves and try and understand people

Ironical aye? These people otherwise believe they know it all?

This is what you get for sitting in front of an art director’s ‘mac’

I look so innocent don’t I – I’m trying to keep a straight face , despite being provoked !